August 2, 2018
Just Check In
It’s amazing what a few well-timed words delivered via text message can do to make you feel loved and supported. I’m not talking about an “I love you” text from a spouse. No, this text came from a friend and just the right time, and it’s changed how I’m approaching my friendships.
“I know life’s been stressful for you lately. How are you holding up?”
It was simple, and maybe to others it would be no big deal, but it meant the world to me. Maybe it’s my stereotypical middle-child self, but in the moment I felt seen and heard. She didn’t just brush off my comments as silly complaints. No words of advice were offered; it was just a check-in, really. What my friend didn’t know was that I was quickly heading toward an anxiety attack, and her text took me slowed me down.
So now, I remind myself to check in with my friends. To really pay attention to what they’re dealing with and let them know in an unobtrusive way that I’m here. As adults, our days are filled to the brim with a lot of different responsibilities, and with our attention often focused on our spouses and our jobs, our friendships can get a little neglected if we’re not careful.
Just check in. It takes just a couple seconds, but the impact can be huge. Ask how that doctor’s appointment went. Ask how that new restaurant she tried was. Make your friends feel seen and supported, and I promise they will do the same for you.